It’s tough when you are triggered. It happens jet fast. All of a sudden a prickly energy runs up your spine and you feel the energy rush to your head. You are ready to fight and hotly defend yourself or your anger turns icy and you freeze out whomever or whatever is disturbing you. Either way you disconnect. It keeps you relatively safe, but it doesn’t feel good...
There is Power in the Story You Tell Yourself
The creative life force flows through you and manifests itself continuously. Your body is recreating itself from the patterns in your DNA, from the thoughts and beliefs you hold, and the images and emotions that stream through your heart. These are the elements of your story. Your story is vast. It is the story of your ancestor’s experiences and beliefs about life. It is the story of how they survived, their relationship to the land and the people they loved and those they had conflict with. It is the story of their pain and triumphs. It is the story of their culture, the language, songs, dress, customs and mores, religions, social organization, governance and the ways in which they formed community. Your story emerges from theirs but at the same time it is your own. In every moment you are born anew from the story you tell yourself about who you are...
You’ve heard it before, “Forgive and Move on,” and inside you are still reeling from the pain and hurt that has been done and there is no way you want to “forgive, forget or move on.” The feeling of violation is strong and you feel justified in blaming and having resentment. If you were betrayed, unloved, neglected, rejected, lied to, cheated, dismissed, manipulated, silenced, emotionally or physically abused, you want justice and acknowledgment of the wrong that has been done to you....
Does your inner voice judge you or demean you? Is a critical voice telling you what you “should” or “should not” do or experience? Do you have a feeling that somehow you are not enough or do not matter?
At first, your Inner Critic may wake you up and try to get your attention; “better work on that project, get going, you are going to be late, quit procrastinating, you made a mistake, be responsible, exercise, eat healthier.” It informs and jars you into action. It can be helpful, nudging and prodding you into beneficial behaviors.
If you haven’t paid attention, it often turns ugly and begins to berate you. It says mean things about your character; “you are lazy, stupid, ugly, irresponsible, wrong, weak, no good, damaged, you can’t do anything right, nobody will ever want to be with you and you will never amount to anything.” Those may be mild words compared with your critic...
Relational Life Couples Therapist
International Teacher Meditation Facilitator
Dreamer, Visionary, Writer