You have been taught many ways that seem harmless to push away, ignore or get rid of these emotions and yet these ways are disconnecting you from yourself. They are disconnecting you from your inner guidance and your ability to navigate this reality. Instead of empowering you, some of the more benign techniques teach you how to “manage” your emotions, not connect with them. At the worst, the methods taught are controlling and shaming. You end up feeling that something is wrong with you for having powerful emotions.
Unfelt emotions gather, build up inside of you and grow. Eventually they expand into a swirling mass of unexpressed energy. The pressure builds, shakes, rumbles and bubbles up to the surface. Each time the unwanted bits that you don’t want to feel come up, you think, “I don’t like that, it makes me feel awful. How can I get rid of it?” You focus on the “goal” of eliminating it. You may judge the emotion, shove it back down, pretend it doesn’t exist, distract your attention away from it, cover it over with a more “positive” feeling, project it onto someone or something else, or shame yourself for having it or not being able to get rid of it. None of these methods actually change anything or bring you sustained relief.
Have you ever wondered why you have emotions that do not “feel” good? There is a long history of demonizing these emotions. These are seen as bad or even evil and if these emotions arise within you, you are then thought to be bad for having them. Anger and depression are ones that top the “shameful” list. If you believe that being angry or depressed means you are a bad or disturbed person then you are not going to want to feel or admit experiencing those states nor will you be willing to go deeper into them to understand or find out what those states are telling you.
Emotional Crying is cleansing and one of the body's natural ways of healing. It releases built up tension and toxic stress hormones. As you allow the authentic expression of your tears without shame, you ease stress, elevate your mood and get in touch with your deeper feelings. Shaming or critical thoughts, such as seeing yourself as weak or thinking being vulnerable is bad, cancels the incredible healing benefits of tears.
What is Happening to Your Thoughts?
Take a moment to feel the sensations of anticipation and anxiousness. What is the difference? Notice how the physical sensations of both are the same. The difference happens in your mind and the way it interprets the experience. When you feel positive anticipation your thoughts are filled with happy future outcomes and the giddy, jumpy sensations in your body are received with pleasure. When you anticipate a negative future, you perceive it as anxiousness. Your mind recalls every conceivable past memory and experience that did not work out the way you wanted or you imagine how terrible it could be. Your mind is showered with a deluge of thoughts and races between a series of bad outcomes. You automatically retract and push against a dreaded future. The sensations inside of your stomach and brain now become uncomfortable or even perceived as repulsive with the resistance. As you dwell on these thoughts, the physical sensations escalate and can turn into actual physical illness. The meaning you give an experience is derived from the mind. Thoughts, judgments and beliefs influence your perception and alter the actual reality.
Your Mind Cannot be Trusted
Why Some Emotions Don’t Feel Good
Your Emotional Sensory System is a Powerful Resource
Your five senses, vision, touch, hearing, smell, and taste, take in a wealth of information. Another organ, the heart, is constantly scanning the inner and outer environment with an enormous electro-magnetic field. Heart Math research has found that the electrical field of the heart is 60 times greater than the electrical field of the brain and the magnetic field is 5,000 times greater than the magnetic field of the brain. Emotions, through the exquisite vibration of feeling, transmit this sensory information to every cell of your body. By not feeling your emotions you are casting aside a treasure trove of knowledge.
Use all of your resources. Instead of negating your emotions, pay attention to your emotions and allow yourself to welcome the bodily sensations and healthy emotional expression of your feelings. You will come to know and love the incredible guidance the emotional sensory system offers.